The One Where We Proposed to Our Closest Friends
Wedding entourage reveal, pasta for twenty, and the gift of friends who feel like home
Twenty pairs of shoes scattered messily around the doorway. A beautiful kind of chaos. I had just peeked into the kitchen to check on Ben, who was hard at work, trying to cook pasta for twenty people—his first time ever feeding a crowd that big. 😅
He was focused, a little flustered, slightly sweaty (understandably)… but smiling. I smiled, too, watching him stir the noodles with so much care. I know how much he wants to get this right. That’s one of the things I love most about him. He puts his whole heart into the little things, especially when it’s for the people he loves.
And then I slipped away into the other room, where our guests were waiting.
As I opened the door, a light, happy hum flooded my ears.
Laughter. Familiar voices. Someone yelling for more bread. The sound of coffee and matcha being slurped in between stories. It’s the kind of noise that only happens when a room is filled with people who know each other well.
These were the friends Ben and I have grown up with.
The ones we’ve played Mario Kart with in this very room.
Who stayed late after meetings, planned retreats, had sleepovers on this floor while preparing for camp.
The ones who’ve celebrated many birthdays and walked with us through heartbreak. The friends who’ve seen all the versions of us—and still stayed.
They’ve witnessed our cringiest moments, our indecisions, our bad decisions (including questionable hair cuts and outfits)—and loved us anyway.
They’ve called us out when we needed it, held space when we didn’t have words, and reminded us—again and again—that we were never alone.
They’re the people who helped get us here—not just to this dinner, but to this very moment in Ben’s and my life.
That night, Ben and I decided to open the Eleven Coffee space just for them. A dinner party for our closest friends.
But it wasn’t just a dinner—it was something more. It was the night we asked the people dearest to us a very special question.
Somewhere between the laughter and (no exaggeration) the best shrimp pasta Ben has ever made, Ben and I stood up and shared why we had gathered everyone here.
One by one, I handed out small bouquets. Flowers wrapped in manila paper, each with a handwritten note tucked inside. On the front: “Will you be my bridesmaid?”
What came after was a lot of screaming, crying, hugging, and chaotic-but-cute picture taking with my bridal party. 💐🥹
Then, it was the boys’ turn.
Ben stood up and shared that he had technically already asked his groomsmen… but, in true Ben fashion, he may have forgotten a few people. (Not surprised. Hahaha.)
So he started calling them out, one by one.
Some already knew. A couple didn’t.
But all of them smiled like they were just waiting to be asked.
It all felt surreal.
Somehow, asking that question to our friends made getting married feel even more real.
And in the midst of all the joy, I had this quiet realization: we’re still here.
After all the transitions.
The growing up.
The shifting seasons.
The different callings.
All the places life has taken us—
We’re still here in each other’s lives. Not because it’s convenient. Not because we see each other all the time. But because God, in His goodness, has kept us close.
We may serve Him in different ways now. Our lives look so different than they did 10 years ago. Our rhythms are no longer always in sync. But our friendship has never been about being in the same places—it’s always been about our shared loved for the One who first brought us together.
That night reminded me of the kind of friendship that really lasts. The kind that spans seasons. That grows with you. That holds you through the hard stuff and celebrates the good. The kind that doesn’t ghost you when things get messy or complicated—but pulls up a chair and stays.
And that’s why there’s no one else Ben and I would want standing beside us on our wedding day—because they’ve already stood beside us through so much more.
They have been God’s grace to us in the joy, the sorrows, and everything in between. And I’m so excited to see how we’re all gonna grow even more in this new season of our lives.
They are, without a doubt, friends for life. Friends who stay. Friends who remind you of who you are—and how deeply loved you are. Friends who feel like coming home.
And I’m so, so grateful God has given them to me.
If you’ve found friends like that, hold them close.
Celebrate them. Give them flowers. Share a cup of good coffee with them.
Make pasta for them. Invite them over. Keep showing up for each other.
Because friendships like these?
They are a gift. One worth keeping.
One you’re gonna want to thank God for, always.
“Sweet friendships refresh the soul and awaken our hearts with joy.” - Proverbs 27:9
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Tisha x
You're pretty good with words